Let you be your ruler


With Kingsday amongst us in the Netherlands, we’re celebrating a crown that has lost a lot of its initial meaning. As a matter of fact, most of us aren’t really sure what we’re celebrating exactly at all, besides a man’s birthday. Meanwhile we often have the feeling that we are being lived instead of first handedly living our lives ourselves. This all comes down to the difference between being alive and living, but sometimes it can be hard to step it up successively. Keeping this in mind, celebrating a king that doesn’t have any power over our lives will probably make you feel alive for the time being, but talking long-term it doesn’t compete with the fact that we are the actual royalty of our own experience and can use this reign to influence our lives for the better!

Here are the golden tips to conquer the seven kingdoms of your life.

1 – Sleep and food
You better believe royalty gets enough quality sleep and vitamins to fuel the ruling that has to be done. Without fuel you are bound to have a problematic reign, so make sure this fundamental kingdom is nowhere from falling out of your reach!
To have a good night’s rest it’s important to start killing the lights starting from an hour or two before you want to fall asleep, so your body stops breaking down the sleep-inducing hormone melatonin thinking it’s still daytime. This includes the light coming from either your phone or computer. Luckily there are apps you can download (like f.lux) to eliminate the most notorious culprit, blue light. Melatonin capsules and/or hot chamomile tea can also help improve your sleep habit by making you fall asleep quicker. In short: don’t be the princess on the pea by staying up till three.
Considering food the most important things are to get all the nutrients you need and eating at regular times to make sure your system gets these nutrients at the times when it needs it the most. That’s why breakfast is the most important meal of the day, because having a full day ahead of you means that your body can use the nutritional buffer that breakfast can provide. As the saying goes: breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dine like a pauper.

2 – Time management
A king or queen has places to be, coins to collect and alliances to be formed. Without proper managing of time you will not be able to do all those things in a way that satisfies you or the people around you (remember those faces your friends make when you’re late- AGAIN). A few tips to improve your ruling of this area are get an agenda (and actually use it) for the long term, make to do lists for the short-term things you can do now or in the near future and to create a rhythm, make a flexible weekly schedule with only the bare necessities written down on it (like time to wake up, eat, and go to bed). Also buy clocks of all kinds: home clocks, alarm clocks, a watch. The more clocks the better! Since you can´t afford an assistant yet, fake it till you make it and be your own!

3 – Goals
Being self-respectable royalty takes time and effort, and to get full reign over your life there are a lot of goals to be set. As a matter of fact, perfection is not a realistic goal, though it would be the goal to end them all, but since it doesn’t exist setting goals is something that you probably will never stop doing. The most important thing in setting goals is making your goals SMART:
Specific (simple, sensible, significant), Measurable (meaningful, motivating). Achievable (agreed, attainable), Relevant (reasonable, realistic and resourced, results-based) and Time bound (time-based, time limited, time/cost limited, timely, time-sensitive).

4 – Priorities
Now, we normally don’t discriminate, but your priorities need to be straight. This can be a really hard thing to do, so spend time evaluating the things you find important and put them in a ranking order. This way you will have an easier time delegating what you spend time and energy on in the future.

5 – Finances
I’m personally not a financial prodigy. But when I said fake it till you make it, I didn’t mean buy that Gucci purse that you saw on a celeb (because that what queens do right?). More like buy that cheap-knock off version (but only if you REALLY need it). Also, seek help from other’s who might be better at managing finances (like a parent or a friend who has more experience managing their money).

6 – Don’t be afraid to make the tough decisions
No ruler is able to rule successfully without having to make a tough decision once in a while. That includes you. Just make one. Realize that not making one is also a decision in itself, one of which the outcome you can most of the time even predict but choose to ignore because you’re too busy not being sure of what to choose.

7 – Self-care, self-love, and being thankful
Self-care and self-love are two different things, but they’re both of high importance. You have to love the kingdom that is you and take care of it accordingly.
Self-care would be taking good care of yourself, making sure you’re comfortable and enjoying yourself. Self- love is about empowerment, finding strength and seeking the things that empower you to keep doing the things that you want in life. This is a special kind of fuel aside from sleep and food. Try to evaluate at random moments during your day and ask yourself: ‘’does this empower me?’’ If not, you might want to consider spending your time differently. Getting rid of things that don’t empower you can also be self-love in itself.
Lastly, constantly looking to improve yourself is in the end a negative experience, when you don’t appreciate what you have now. Even though these tips are about improvement, dissatisfaction isn’t necessary to instigate that. Besides, it’s not a good look on anybody, so make sure not to wear it too often.
In all three cases: Reward yourself, you deserve this crown!

In conclusion, your view on your life as a realm must include you crowning yourself as the one ruling over it! Working on how different aspects of your experience are going about is possibly a way of improving it. Now reign, my kings, queens, and in-betweens. Good luck!

By Bilal Errazki


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